The best way to talk to yourself

18 September 2020 , Posted by Rachel Bate & Julie Loveny

Consider the language you use when you talk to yourself. Does the voice inside your mind give you a positive and encouraging effect, or do you find yourself feeling pulled back by the words you use?

Self-Talk is basically your inner voice and it can have a great impact on how we feel and what we do in our daily lives. Sometimes negative self-talk, like “that was stupid”, or “I’ll stuff that up” can be very destructive to our mood, confidence and motivation to try new things, but luckily there are ways to make your inner voice your ally.

Positive self-talk is supportive and encouraging, and can help you to improve self-esteem and manage stress. Here are three tips to help you develop positive self-talk:

• Be aware – listen to what to say to yourself, is it mostly positive or negative? Take time to consider what you say, perhaps even write it down.

• Challenge it – ask yourself, is what you are saying true? If a friend was in this situation would I be telling them the same thing? If my thoughts aren’t helpful, how can I change that? What are my strengths?

• Transform your talk – this is may be easier said than done, but it is worth the effort. Consider what might be a more helpful thought, such as “What can I do so that I am able to do this?” and “How can I change how I feel about this?”

Being able to recognise when you are talking negatively is a good skill to develop, as self-talk is a large factor influencing general health and well-being. Taking control of that talk can help you achieve your goals, improve your mood and feel inspired.