Talking to Yourself – Communication and Self Talk
You might think that talking to yourself is a little crazy but actually we all do it – lots of the time. Mostly in our heads rather than aloud!
How you think about yourself can make a big difference to how you feel and live your daily life. It can either lift your mood or make you feel even worse when things are not going so well.
We are told with children that it’s important to lift their self esteem by talking to them positively and helping them grow. It’s the same when we are talking to ourselves. If we put ourselves down in our self talk it doesn’t help. It can drop our mood further and make a situation feel and look even worse. It can even become a habit.
If on the other hand we talk to ourselves in a positive way and focus on what we like about ourselves or what we believe we are doing well – then this can make a big difference to your energy and even work performance. Athletes do it all the time to achieve their goal and maintain their overall fitness.
How can you take advantage of self talk? Be your own best friend and avoid letting negative thoughts creep in. Even if things aren’t going so well at a particular moment, focusing on the positive can help you find solutions and move forward.
Here are some tips:
- Remember something positive others have said about you.
- Think about what you like about yourself – now and in the past.
- Speak out loud (this might feel a little silly at first but talking to the mirror or yourself occasionally wont do any harm – just make sure you’re on your own!)
- Remember your ‘inner child’ and treat them well.
There are lots of studies that show the benefit of self talk which can include better mental and physical health, better relationships (at work and home) and even improved performance on the job. It doesn’t mean you’re a big head it means you actually like and even learn to love yourself more. That’s okay.
Here’s a video from Ivan Joseph, Head Coach of University Soccer which says more about self confidence and self talk – just transfer the sport/university examples to your own situation.